For the Singles: How to Avoid Extramarital S*x


Yes, you heard right. That’s the Bible talking concerning unmarried folks, and that is quite different from what we are used to seeing in the media or even hearing about from people we know. With each passing year, our youth are having extramarital sex earlier and earlier. As if that were not bad enough, it seems there are no adults left on this earth who respect the institution of marriage and what is exclusive to such a union — i.e. s*x. Many believers already have it drilled into their heads that extramarital s*x is wrong, so why do so many Christians get caught up in doing it anyway? Many have not yet mastered how to efficiently avoid the temptation in the first place.  This brings us to our key text coming out of I Corinthians 7:1 — 3, 8 — 9 (KJV). The word of the Lord reads:

Now concerning the things whereof ye wrote unto me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, to avoid fornication, let every man have his own wife, and let every woman have her own husband. 3 .…8I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, it is good for them if they abide even as I. But if they cannot contain, let them marry: for it is better to marry than to burn.

At this point in the scriptures, Paul is addressing the church of Corinth through a letter. In his correspondence, he informs his readers that the secret to avoiding fornication is to “not even go there.” It makes no sense to dance all around a pit and wonder how you fell in. One cannot set out to avoid fornication by kissing and feeling all over someone. We all know where that ultimately leads. Bottom line: if one truly desires to avoid extramarital s*x, he or she will not engage in activities that will lead to doing so. The second way to avoid extramarital s*x is plain and simple — marriage. God created us to procreate, so it is only natural for humans to have s*xual desires, but He created intercourse only for the enjoyment of individuals joined in holy matrimony. This is why Paul tells his readers that if they cannot maintain celibacy, they need to find either a wife or a husband accordingly.

As we go about our days, let us ask the Lord to help us not to fall prey to extramarital s*xual temptation. Let us also entreat the Lord to help us not even play with the idea or try to get as close as we can get without actually having extramarital s*x. Ask and ye shall receive. The Lord will give you what you need.

Have a blessed day!


The founder of Your Black PoetsAyvaunn Penn is an award-winning writer and the author of Ephemeral Moments: a collection of poetry and short stories available soon on To receive Ayvaunn’s daily devotionals by email, click here. Click to follow her on Facebook and Twitter. To have your original poetry featured on Your Black Poets, click here.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s